ACCEPTING WHAT IS: LESSONS FROM A DIFFICULT SEASON

This time of year always stirs something in me. When the clocks change and the days grow shorter, I can feel a subtle shift — a bit of a pit in my stomach, a sense of discomfort that doesn’t visit me in other seasons. The quiet settles in, the energy shifts inward, and I notice myself resisting it.

I’ve always felt most alive in spring and summer — the warmth, the color, the outward energy, my hands in the garden connecting me to the rhythm of life. Fall and winter have carried a different weight — reminders of loss: my parents, a marriage, and the community I left behind in Massachusetts. All parts of my story I’m grateful for, yet still mourn in their own way.

When I met with my therapist recently, she asked how I was doing, and I said, “I’m fine.” We both knew what that meant — usually, “I’m fine” is a sign that we’re not fine at all. We talked about how I tend to resist this season — and the emotions that come with it. She reminded me that true change begins with acceptance — not pushing away what’s uncomfortable, but learning to sit with it.

Together, we brainstormed a plan — ways to change my story for the season and create new rituals that would bring more warmth, connection, and meaning into these shorter days. I decided to plan a holiday open house to invite people into my space and explore new volunteer opportunities to help me stay connected to purpose and community.

I’m sharing this not for sympathy or comfort, but because I know I’m not the only one who feels this way — especially as the holidays approach. Whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a shift in family dynamics, or simply holidays that look and feel different than they used to, this time of year can stir up a lot. Sometimes we just need to hear someone say it out loud — that it’s okay to feel both gratitude and grief at the same time.

So this year, I’m trying to do just that — and if you’re feeling it too, here are a few gentle ways to support yourself through this season:

🌿 Up your self-care game. Embrace slower, grounding habits like reading, yoga, and mindful movement instead of constant motion.

💗 Practice gratitude and self-compassion. Notice small comforts and release guilt for slowing down. You’re allowed to rest.

🌞 Seek light, literally. Get outside when you can — even ten minutes of morning sunlight can shift your mood and energy. Let natural light remind your body it’s safe to slow down.

🕯️ Be intentional about connection. Reach out to friends, join a community event, or volunteer. Isolation feeds heaviness; connection softens it.

💬 Ask for what you need. Vulnerability can feel risky, but it builds true closeness and reminds us we’re not meant to do life alone.

🌸 Trust the quiet. Remember that stillness has its own kind of wisdom — this season may be preparing you for new growth in spring.

Maybe this season isn’t meant to be endured but embraced. Maybe it’s here to remind us that rest is not resistance — it’s renewal.